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ABOUT THE AUTHOR
Leslie Scalapino
Leslie Scalapino
Born on July 25, 1944, in Santa Barbara, California, Leslie Scalapino taught at UC San Diego, where her papers are held in the Mandeville Special Collections Library...
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way [excerpts]

 
by Leslie Scalapino

to have
seem-
ed still—
though not
wanting to
be serene
—their—

I was in school; the bus driver seeing a girl crossing the street hadn't stopped—she'd been hit—so the other students—the boys—would hit the side of the bus everyday

when we went around that corner—our understanding the driver—and clairvoyant

their—to
simply
make
that—
having
occur-
red to me

*

made—to
be con-
vention in
the present
—their—my
by myself

I was a waitress in a restaurant of a department store—and stole a dress from the store—though it was said that most of the thieves were employees

this had been said to us in the orientation meeting

to make
—as
in—their
—it
with—
a person—in
a time

*

their
to have
not
known
the same
people
throughout
a time

which is in another man—the sense of being aware—we were in bed, asleep. Outside the house an accident occurred. A huge trailer-truck crashed into the base of the overpass—no other cars were around

It was quiet—the cops coming and flashing their lights around the crumpled cab of the truck—a few of their words carrying to us

that—the

so-
cial world

—them—as
in it

*

weeping in the hall once—before being composed enough to unlock the door and go into the apartment—anyone being in this state


a boy—so it's in the past, though he'd said this about himself—on his father's sailboat

wanting to consider it his; his father jeering at him for that—it being fixed would be to free the past from myself (not necessarily it freed from him)—that would be the life of desire



driving away from the projects—the man seeing them

and so endangering the other men—their being benign—who are motionless outside; saying it wasn't known what people like this are going to do


*

them—as
a func-
tion
of memory
—someone—

*

meeting up
with
a person
—who's
young—being
like that
individual

*

I dreamed I was to use rags though a truck came along the street taking them off. I was looking at a river from sun windows where I saw apes that were giant—my knowing it wasn't usually seen and was germane to the rags—a giant ape that was male floating submerged on his back in very blue water, hi genitals seen—floating gently as well. Some in the group stood up wearing the khaki clothes; them walking off into the town—it occurring to me, who would be interested in rags

that—as
"cruelty" to
be learned
as a
period but
from some
individual

*

The thought of the construction workers—seeing them—having occurred then

later—events set in terms of chronology—which may be earlier in time, but emotionally are of a later age


that would be the age—which the boy on his father's sailboat

would be part of—and my being free therefore

—I'm out
walking by
myself—to be
like some
individual
—them—and
being
serene

*

I had insomnia, not because of this—the birds were on the roof, walking around—though it was night; I thought birds slept at night

it occurred to me they were like me—the reverse of me though—owing to their being in that situation


*

throwing
themselves
away
throughout
a time
occurring
for
a reason





Audio Clip
Donnell Library
New York City
March 13, 1990



From way by Leslie Scalapino. Copyright 1988. Used by permission of the author. All rights reserved.
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