Men are legally allowed to have sex with animals, as long as the animals are female. Having sexual relations with a male animal is taboo and punishable by death. As long as the fish are female saleswomen in tropical fish stores are allowed to go topless. Adultery is punishable by death as long as the betrayed
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The barista at the coffee shop is covered in tattoos. She says there are only two ways they hold her back. 1. She can’t work at Starbucks. 2. She can’t wear a corsage, since she’d just be way too busy, and this makes me laugh. She says no to gifts from prom dates—the wrist corsage, the pinned corsage; no to bridal bouquets, the get-well-soon carnations. One day soon her mother will insist on sympathy wreaths around her coffin, which is closed, lest she be confused with the flowers.