I'd Like a Little Flashlight

Rachel Zucker

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and I'd like to get naked and into bed and be hot radiating heat from the inside these sweaters and fleeceys do nothing to keep out the out or keep my vitals in—some drafty body I've got leaking in and out in all directions I'd like to get naked into bed but hot on this early winter afternoon already dusky grim and not think of all the ways I've gone about the world and shown myself a fool, shame poking holes in my thinned carapace practically lacy and woefully feminine I'd like to get naked into bed and feel if not hot then weightless as I once was in the sensory deprivation tank in Madison, Wisconsin circa 1992 I paid money for that perfectly body-temperatured silent pitch dark tank to do what? play dead and not die? that was before email before children before I knew anything more than the deaths of a few loved ones which were poisoned nuts of swallowed grief but nothing of life of life giving which cuts open the self bursting busted unsolvable I'd like to get naked into the bed of my life but hot hot my little flicker-self trumped up somehow blind and deaf to all the dampening misery of my friends' woe-oh-ohs and I'd like a little flashlight to write poems with this lousy day not this poem I'm writing under the mostly flat blaze of bulb but a poem written with the light itself a tiny fleeting love poem to life hot hot hot a poem that would say "oh look here a bright spot of life, oh look another!"

Copyright 2011 by Rachel Zucker. Used with permission of the author.

Poems by This Author

After Baby After Baby by Rachel Zucker
When we made love you had
Diary [Surface] by Rachel Zucker
Spring is not so very promising as it is the thing
Hey Allen Ginsberg Where Have You Gone and What Would You Think of My Drugs? by Rachel Zucker
hey, listen, a bad thing happened to
Letter [Persephone to Demeter] by Rachel Zucker
At home, the bells were a high light-yellow
Poem by Rachel Zucker
The other day Matt Rohrer said

Further Reading

Related Poems
A Light Says Why
by Karen Volkman
Detail of My Sort of Light
by Ander Monson
Great Sleeps I Have Known
by Robin Becker
Tender Buttons [A Little Called Pauline]
by Gertrude Stein
In This Light
by Matt Hart